TEN REASONS NOT TO EAT OUT WITH A MAN
1. They think broccoli is a foreign exam.
2. They think aperitif is what you take out to give them a blowjob.
3. They think sashimi and saki are an invitation to fire them after a liquid lunch. (Sho shue me and give me the sacky!)
4. They think le cloche is a French punk band.
5. They think gravitas is Latin for gravy.
6. They think nan bread is what nanny gave them for their eggy soldiers.
7. They think vagina is what you use when the Queen comes for tea.
8. They think steak tartare is what gets stuck in your teeth after a meal.
9. They think decanter is what you do just before the gallop.
10. They think cappuccinos are trousers from Boden.
Taken from Kathy Lette’s forthcoming book, O Tempura, O More, Please! The Thinking Girl’s Guide to Food and Sex